welcome back, december

I hate that I'm feeling this thrown. Like I'm weak for having let anyone in in the first place, and even weaker for feeling so destroyed by it. I'm not supposed to be like this, I'm supposed to be made of tougher stuff. Clearly I had a lapse in judgment, and I need to remedy that. So you know what? I am going to go back to a life where I just don't fucking talk to people who aren't directly in my way. Malcolm hadn't been right, but he will be now. And I'm going to be fine with that. And Eric can fight his stupid war where he tossed everyone on the funeral pyre, and maybe he'll rot in prison some day. Or maybe he'll live happily ever after, and that'll be that. I'm not going to care. And Mickey, he can go marry god or something, and never come back. He's too holy roller for me anyways, I don't even believe in the same shit and it's a huge part of his life. If anything's a deal breaker it should be that. Add on top of that the confusion in general, and the fact that he's some fluffy little bunny who strayed onto a seriously wrong path...yeah. He can go. I hope I never see him again. Or Eric. Or anyone.

Welcome back, December. Remember this next time you wander off the beaten fucking path you laid for yourself in the first place. Wasn't fun there in la la happy fucking shiny land, was it? No, it wasn't. It was nice and then it was mind numbingly horrifying, and let's not be a stupid dipshit and let that slip our minds again, shall we? Get back on that solitary track. There was a reason for it before the miserably failed experiment that was your life for the past few weeks, there's a reason for it now, don't let yourself forget ever again. It'll suck less in the long run. Trust me.